Don't ever mention your family to me

Just a word of advice. Unless you are a maiden who wants to marry me, do not ever mention your family to me. The maiden’s family who will be my in-laws are the only ones I will ever tolerate, and not because I want to, because it is important to her. If she does not care about that, all the better. I would not expect that or ask that of her, but I will not let her family disrespect me or belittle me like my own family does, and if they do I will show them no respect in return when I destroy their lives with a few words.

I hate family. Absolutely despise the very concept. It is the most unpleasant, repulsive, and reviled concept in my life. Nothing is more wrong to me than family. Is that normal? No. That is horribly wrong, but it is my reality. I cannot change that. I cannot change people. I cannot turn back time. I cannot help people who will not help themselves.

So… never mention your family relatives to me as though I will understand, care, or empathize with the feeling because I will not. That is impossible for me because of how hateful my family is toward me, and I don’t particularly care.

They want me to interact with them so they can feel better while I feel worse because of how they think of me. Do you know what that is called? Parastic. They are psychic vampires, but vampire is too good of a word for them. They are leeches, parasites, and evil scum who I will not degrade myself for their benefit ever again, nor did I ever by choice. I simply did not know that was the case until I became an adult and learned the truth about life.

Now, I will have nothing to do with them. I will not speak to them, visit them, or even think about them. That makes me feel good, and I don’t give a shit about their feelings because they are not family to me. They are strangers, enemies, hostile beings that I cannot abide. They are not trusted, they are not respected, they are not wanted, they are nothing but stink and filth that I will not allow in my life.

It crossed my mind yesterday how awkward their “gatherings” must be now that I am not there to be looked down upon as some less than human creature who will never belong to society and thus they pity. To hell with that! That is not true! They are wrong, and they are the ones who will never belong in society! They are the ones who make themselves less than human creatures and will never be welcome in my home just as I was never welcome with them.

Their friends and distant relatives probably wonder, “how is Nick doing? Where is he?” Then the silence, so awkward and toxic it could clear all pests from the home with the fumes of an exterminating gas. That is all I will allow myself to think about because it sounds awful, and I want nothing to do with them.

I’ve got my own life, and if I can’t make it work, then I will die knowing I did my best, but that society and my nation failed me, and I will not be to blame. I will have no shame, guilt, or regret for being unable to do on my own what civilization is supposed to do for everyone.

So… that’s life for me. Unless you want some extreme hate being projected toward your family because of how little I want to know about your relationships, which is nothing at all, do not mention them. If you will talk about such people, do not bring them up in conversation as relevant because they are family. Simply address them as other people who may as well be total strangers if you did not know them personally. I will never be able to accept your family concepts with understanding or peace. They are highly unpleasant to me.

End.

My family has not nor ever will circumcise a child, meaning

That starts with me. The man of a new family. I reject those wretched people I had the misfortune of enduring until I became a man and realized what was important in life and worth protecting. It is not those people or what they value. They have also proven themselves to be the most hostile of enemies to me as well.

In any case, my family will not have circumcision within it ever, and if it ever does, cast that one out to be on their own and let them die unless an uncircumcised child somehow comes back from them. Any woman who marries a circumcised man is cast out. She will not be welcome in the family or community. I don’t care if it is fair or not, that is the law of my home, and I will enforce it.

That means that the tribe of my family does not circumcise nor allow it. The town. The state. The nation. The entire civilization. That is my law, and if you cannot abide that or respect it, you will be my enemy and I will not hold anything back when I destroy you because of the kind of threat to the community safety and health circumcision is.

Even if I have to make this happen one generation at a time, I will do away with circumcision. I will not relent or compromise with them. I’ve given them too many chances to accept a peaceful agreement according to the laws of my land and their land, but they have never understood the importance of laws nor respected them when they are most important. I am done negotiating.

I want nothing to do with them. I don’t want anything they are selling. I don’t want anything they offer as gifts. I do not want to be their friends. I do not want to play games with them. I do not want to interact with circumcised people at all. It’s a lot of work to clear them out of the world, but there is nothing better to do because they defile everything already so nothing is productive, useful, or helpful anymore. When they are cleared away, we are going to ensure they never come back, because we are going to do away with all the “good” ones too, because none of them are good enough.

The exception will be men who were not circumcised until they are at least 33 years old, because that is my age at this moment. If it happens before then, they are cast out. Unless… it was proven to be a crime of force against someone who can legally testify in court against the offender. Meaning a person who was circumcised as an infant may be welcome as a groom or friend if they acknowledge it was a crime and take formal legal action on public record against the offender.

Jesus was rejected, and all was forgiven. Then I was rejected in spite of Jesus, and now none are forgiven. If you will be saved, save yourself in the way prescribed above. It is of no concern to women and never was, except when they were considered property of the men. That is no longer the case and the salvation of the Christ is entirely irrelevant to women as well as the salvation of self, unless of course that abomination from the Muslim world finds its way over here… in which case I expect the most severe retaliation from the entire community.

This is something to be happy about, and I encourage celebration because of what this means. I would like to enjoy that too, but it is very difficult to enjoy anything right now because of the constant assault I am under by wretched circumcisers who have access to systems they should not have access to, and are abusing them with that access simply to prevent me from being happy. They are defiling something sacred with no concept of how much damage in real life their immature cruelty is causing other people than myself. We need to get some pitchforks and torches, find the beast and put him in a prison box and keep him out of the world at all times and never let him back in. Let the world turn around him in his prison cell while he thinks about what he did. Until I clear them away and make some space to breathe, or find someone willing to help, I will continue to be exceedingly bitter and salty because of how much they are bothering me without any regard for my consent, privacy, or well-being. I may be able to express joy and other good feelings more often when they are gone, so if anyone knows how to start pushing them back, please do. Keep them away.

Whoever is doing it has been doing it under someone else’s supervision for a long time. I imagine that is probably the CIA. They are totally aware of how inhumanly monstrous that person in being to me, destroying everything in my life, all my hopes and dreams, and putting obstacles and insults in every step of normal everyday life. They prevent me from using normal applications of civilization to make my life more convenient and better, and I already have enough trouble functioning in this accursed world that makes no god damn sense. So what does the CIA do? They watch and turn me into some science experiment of theirs. They sit there snickering and place bets wonder what I am going to do. “Let’s see what he does next to hurt him and how he responds, this is getting more and more interesting!”

I am totally aware they are watching like that, and am like “WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM!? THIS IS NOT A MOVIE!!! THIS IS MY LIFE!!! You will not get away with making my suffering into your spectacle. All that power has gone to your head because you forgot the most important lessons of power, and that is that good triumphs over evil. I do not know how I will do so, and I do not need to know because I have faith. Faith gets me through every single moment without a plan, idea, or concept of what I need to do until I am doing it and it never fails.

You fools do not yet notice that even though the president approved of your evil, the president is the highest one with a secret, but he is not the highest authority in the nation. The citizens are higher, and I am one such citizen. It is a long way around, but I will shoot through that atmosphere like electricity, and fry your pathetic excuse of an operation like a bug on a UV lamp. You are the ones buzzing around that fake light on my patio unable to resist, and in the blink of an eye you will be scorched and twitching as you spend your final moments in agonizing pain.

Mine or Yours?

If you are thinking about making the most of this situation by capitalizing on what I am doing, I have no expectations or obligations. I have a plan myself and no matter what you are doing as your own plan, you can be a part of my plan and work with me here. I can also go there, be a part of your plan, or do my own thing on the side and be like a popular vendor for the audience.

As much as I enjoy playing video games and lounging about, the pointless reason why I am doing that is the worst thing imaginable for me. That is the worst thing that could be done to me, because it is oppression to prevent legal freedoms that are sacred to my nation, extreme resistance to deny normal human rights applicable to everyone, and a waste of my time— which is death each moment. As long as life may seem, it is actually very short compared to the timeline of all humanity, and not a single bit of it should be wasted because of evil—having it done to you or doing it yourself.

Being able to do what I most want to do for myself while my time is wasted because I have no other option than to enjoy myself by myself is what makes it worth while. That is not evil, unless you are denying responsibility to do it. I am being denied what is my responsibility, work, and purpose, and not because anybody grants that or that it has anything to do with the world. They are denying me all that is non-bodily by using what is non-bodily of them and expecting me to provide proof of what they are doing. Do you see how unjust that is?

I do have proof, and it is that they are doing it. The damage they are doing to my life is evidence. I don’t need to find the murder weapon. I have the murdered corpse, and the only one with the opportunity is the USA government. That is enough to demand an investigation. The motive can be deduced, but we need to interview them first and get the facts on record. Then we may be able to find the “evidence” they think can’t be found because of how they misunderstood the authority of the USA government.

It may not have been the USA government, but that has to be determined because we have reason to believe without a doubt that it was them. The only difference being that other unlawful activity occurred that is yet unknown as a variable, which is why an investigation is not only demanded, but necessary for the life and security of the entire nation.

Anyway, as much as I love what I am doing, I would much rather be working productively in the community in some way that is profitable while still having enough time to enjoy my favorite hobbies. I have no family to be concerned about because I want to start one of my own, and in my family I would never circumcise a child. That would never happen in all of time in any situation and for no reason. That is the most hateful, unacceptable, and intolerable thing in my family, which is why I reject the one I came from. They don’t understand that, so I cannot be a part of them and need to start my own family.

I don’t need their permission, approval, or blessing, and I don’t care about what they think they can give me, because the problem is theirs, they should have known better, they’ve refused my help, and they were also hateful to me as a child and life there was horrible. Good riddance. I do not even miss them. Not even the tiniest bit. So, that’s actually the best part of all this in my opinion, and that is not anything that anyone can affect or destroy the happiness it brings me. Even though the Jews try to destroy all that makes me happy, all that they destroy is worldly and added altogether it is nothing even remotely close to the happiness that rejecting my family and starting a better one is.

They don’t understand that either. The world is what makes the animal part of me happy, and the animal part of me is most inclined to do violence, have sex, and be top dog on the hill of bones. Normally I would be of no concern to them, because that is what they want and I just want lay in the sun and chase stuff, but because of how they are affecting my worldly life from the hill of bones, I have no choice but to destroy them, and claim the hill as my own to be top dog. That very thing is exactly what they were trying to prevent with preemptive violence from paranoia by trying to destroy all good males they see as threats. Would of never happened if they were not paranoid and acting out of cowardice because of that paranoia by being unable to recognize it as irrational.

“How’s the connection, boys? Did you manage to get an uplink?”

“Still no dice, cap… the weather is Armageddon out there and keeps jamming the signals. We’ve tried everything we can and keep doing so, but have had no luck.”

“Good work. Keep doing what you are doing. We are going to break through the eyewall any moment now, and that should buy you the time you need.”

Junior sailor in the background finishes whatever he was doing with half his body behind the electrical equipment by hanging from the overhead with his legs to reach what he was working on. We he drops down, he pushes them back into place and secures them, then picks up his coffee mug that was lodged in an angle iron by the handle and takes a drink. It appears he has green tea in it by the label of the two tea tags hanging from underneath the seal. Didn’t think anybody drank that stuff.

“Potato wire rigged with a paper clip to bypass the jelly detector, chief.” The sailor with the tea says after exhaling with satisfaction. He then notices my presence. “In accordance with captain’s alterfied order 12B.” He adds hastily.

The chief acknowledges with a nod and doesn’t say anything. He looks over to the other junior sailor with his back to everyone and working the crank wheel on “the hamster box”, as they call it.

There is a tense silence as everyone waits, crammed together with the captain there. Whatever joking or antics may be going on normally are stowed away at the moment, making it especially awkward. Only the chief and the junior sailor doing the potato thing are the only ones who don’t seem concerned at all.

“We’ve got a connection! Up fivers with the Public Net!” the hamster box operator announces with the excitement of a teenager, which he is. Didn’t know he was qualified to do operate that yet, but I told the officers to make sure that type of thing happens, so I can’t question it now. Still though… this isn’t the time for training operators. No… I shouldn’t doubt the chief. He knows his men and what they can do.

At the shell conch receptor the radioman of the watch takes a deep breath, closing his eyes for brief moment before opening them with crystal clear focus, and then takes the shell conch off the pedestal.

When he talks, he uses that same voice he always uses on the air with the slightest Texas drawl and city slicker tone, but you don’t often hear him talk like that at other times.

“Earth to the Jews. Come in. Earth to the Jews, do you copy? Destroying or weakening all the strong, good men is bad idea. Aren’t they the ones who protect you from Muslims? Acknowledge copy. Over. Earth to the Maiden. Come in. Earth to the Maiden, do you copy? Destroying or weakening all the strong, good men is a bad idea. Aren’t they the ones who protect you from everything? Acknowledge copy. Over. Earth to any station, if anyone is listening, cease attacking the Man. He is good and powerful. He has the Christ and is not afraid to use it against you. Any station do you copy?”

….

crackle static crackle

…

“Earth this is Lastation, we read you loud and clear. Don’t give up the ghost. We’re sending in the Nep. What is your location? Over.”

There is an eruption of cheering in the room from everyone but the chief and myself. Even that surly LPO that just got back from duty at boot camp is showing excitement.

"Lastation this is Earth, Roger copy. We’ve got the high ground at the hill of bones and are holding our position. Over.”

There is moment of silence before a response as it dawns on Lastation what that means.

We all wait for their reply, each second with more anticipation until it turns into worry. Did they hear? Is the connection still good? Did something go wrong? Can’t ask those questions now. It will only get in the way. Finally, she responds.

“Earth this is Lastation. The hill of bones, copy. I’m going in myself too after calling for backup. Over.”

“Lastation this is Earth, that is good to hear! We will not monitor this circuit any longer. Logging off the Public Net and going dark. We’ll have pudding ready when you get here. Over and out.”

“Earth this is Lastation, may the schwartz be with you. Over and out.”

I look at the chief who seems pleased with his men despite the bitter scowl on his face, and I give the order.

“Tater the salad, Radio.”

“Tater the salad aye, sir!” the radioman of the watch replies, and then looks directly at the junior sailor who is his trainee and gives him a nod. There is brief moment where the junior sailor’s jaw is slack from all that happened, but he quickly tightens it up, nods and turns around to release the hamster for a clean disconnect.

I leave the room and go to the control center where the officer of the helm is keeping everything together and give him the word he’s expecting. It takes less than a minute before Earth is shifting and the pull of gravity changes direction as we descend back into darkness.

Why I do not like what you may think you like

If you have spent your entire life being loved, adored, cherished, and cared for so that your upbringing occurred with as much assistance as reasonably possible, always having people like your parents to help and encourage you, I suppose I can see why you may enjoy discouraging and meddlesome inconveniences as diverting challenges to entertain.

However, when the opposite applies, as it does in my case, you would hate that kind of thing with a blood boiling rage. My parents and systematic society have always been discouraging, never had an interest to help with my goals, never considered how they may be of service to my benefit as their child, and constantly interfered with meddling, adding obstacles, hindrances, and artificial roadblocks to entirely prevent my success. All they ever were interested in with my life was to force me to fail exactly how they wanted for their arrogant delusions of self-importance by thinking they had a right to circumcise my brother and thus had ownership over my body as uncircumcised.

When I finally freed myself from such monstrous and hateful family and found myself at peace in the real world where I have come to know and like people, total neutrality of strangers is a veritable paradise of angelic grace. At least most people are not outwardly hostile to me or trying to make me fail in the most public and private ways like my family has always been and continues to try to do. Those neighbors in the world as strangers, acquaintances, and friends may not be close and trusted allies to the part of me which is truly king, but a neutral business interest wanting to profit off my profit is infinitely more friendly than the hateful and uncharitable family I left behind.

Do you know what kind of spiritual being can be in that category as an ally? Take a wild guess. However, there are also good people who are genuinely altruistic, charitable, and kind with no need for self-gain, and they may as well be divine angels I’ve met in the flesh and blood bodies of human beings! When there are such people with real divine presence to me… there is no way some spiritual fraud trying to project a non-bodily presence arrogantly claiming to be something they are not even remotely close to, is ever going to be a friend or ally.

I lived long enough on my own to know the difference from natural reality and the present, artificial situation to be able to tell that there is a cabal of evil doers around me trying to make it seem like the world has turned against me. They think I am the fool for not noticing too! I do notice, however, what they do as the worst things they can imagine, is far less horrible than what my own parents did to make me fail. So, it’s not as bad, and that is why I have cause for happiness, but I am also aware of the reality that is beyond their pitiful illusion of smoke and mirrors, and that makes them all the more pathetic and powerless to me. I can’t believe they thought they could actually weave an illusion of reality over someone as well travelled and experienced as me! No matter. Those things are too burdensome for them to maintain endlessly, and I just gotta keep enjoying the better life I have now to see them undone without having to raise a hand against them.

What is more is that I believe in the goodness of reality that I grew up in the world to experience as apart from my family and home, a goodness that is most stoically present as the monolithic Catholic Church, and as most extravagantly exuberant in popular media (as it used to be). That goodness of the world is going to cause those illusions of evil trying to enshroud me in darkness to vanish simply because they are using the most crude, hateful, and foolish evil to covetously hide from the world that which is of the world in me and from me that which is in the world of myself.

Both of us need that illusion gone for our happiness. While I am very important to myself, more than anybody else thinks I am important, but not so important I wouldn’t put my life in the line to be of service to everyone, that world of goodness, is infinitely more important to everyone than the illusion of expensive and destructive hate is that nobody wants nor needs. It’s just common sense. They are going to break first and as I have been assuring them, when that happens we are going to see them put to justice for their crimes.