You who think you have a right to "punish" me

Who the fuck do you think you are to me to be in any position to punish me? You would make the mistake of insulting a man by punishing him for his behavior like he is a child and you are his father or mother?

The very notion is upsetting to think about, and I intend to make you pay the consequences for that mistake, because I am greater than my father and my mother both, and they have no authority over me. None at all. You couldn’t be in a worse position for yourself thinking you could manipulate my life or do anything to me as though you were a parent.

However, you want me to ask my parents for help, well, that’s you in this delusional fantasy of yours isn’t it? You are the one trying to punish me for behavior you find disagreeable even though you never met me, don’t know me, nor know better than me. I posted it a while back saying, “Can you spare a million dollars?” That’s you. Give me money.

How could I ask people who are beneath my dignity for help? They cannot possibly help me. They would only cause me further injury, make my life worse, and compound my problems. They are my enemies, hostile to my well being, and I wouldn’t trust them for anything, especially not for any sort of assistance. That’s pretty much the same way I feel about you in the government pretending to be some sort of parent to me, or you who the government sold me like a slave to, which is the same thing as far as I’m concerned because that is not something that washes off one’s hands.

I’d rather ask the beggars on the street, who are equal in dignity for help, but what could they do in a situation like this? They have more than enough problems as it is. How can I ask a bank for help when you have to already be rich to be able to borrow money at all? It’s not even about lending money to people anymore, it’s a scheme for rich people to collect interest. Ask rich people for help? I tried. Nobody responds to me. Maybe it’s because of this social blockade you have around my life, making you entirely responsible for my problems and my care. So, what the fuck are you waiting for?

If you think you can punish me, why can you not provide for my basic needs? Why can you not do anything a parent or teacher does? Why do you provide no socialization, no human compassion, no friendship, nothing at all. You simply punish me for reasons I can only guess at which is no punishment. That is bullying, torture, and abuse.

I am not so helpless as you may think. I am not so weak as a child. I am not so subject to your authority as you would like to believe. The greatest pain is separation from the divine, and that is what I have done to you between me because you are a leech who contributes nothing divine through that bond and I don’t need you. I am not your God, and you are most certainly not God because you are a leech. I have a bond with the true source, and you attempting to make one like that with me is an attempt to remove the one I already have. You will not enjoy the benefits of that through me as the enemy and adversary you are. I immediately severed that possibility between whoever you are and whoever I am before you could even try to do something like that, just as I severed that possibility between my biological parents. So, if you thought you were getting some kind of divine feedback, you are mistaken, and since you have been behaving as though you have been getting feedback, you are likely going to start experiencing the consequences of all of your mistakes starting from the beginning relatively soon.

It is interesting for me to ponder now that I think about that. It’s kind of difficult to explain but it’s like the very concepts of “mother” and “father” or parents in general were what I severed from my personal divine source of self-identity in my neurocognitive network of concepts and thoughts. Not just the people, but the very concept of a mother or father is something I will never trust. I find the very concept of people walking about as parents as though they deserve respect or “mother’s day” and “father’s day” to be horrid abominations I can barely stand to suffer in public without causing a scene expressing my hatred instead.

Seriously. Circumcision. Case and point. I will never trust parents nor should you. They do not love you, they do not want to help you, and they are not doing anything good for you. Cut them off from your life just to be safe, at least until an age comes when parents and old people are no longer a threat to our lives and future.

Like I write elsewhere: I have no interest becoming a parent or having children. None. Zero. Zilch. I actually feel morally superior for that too because the reason is that I would not curse a human being to be alive in this time, in this nation, and on Earth with other people the way they are. I would not bring a person into existence just so they could suffer, be oppressed, be miserable, and have no hope of enjoying even the smallest goods of life, like entertaining media, because that just isn’t possible anymore. Even if there is a worthy work, the enjoyment is impossible because of the global and international injustice that ruins all enjoyment for everyone.

If you people at fault were having any fun, why do you covet my fun?

I very much want to commit suicide, but it’s difficult to arrange that. I explained this elsewhere. It’s not because I hate myself, or decisions I’ve made, or anything to do with me, more so the unpleasant, boring, and mean-spirited world of evil that amplifies my depression and is not even worth the time to even fight except as personal exercise to divert my attention and prevent boredom. Kind of like physical fitness for enjoyment, except whatever. Who cares. Nobody who matters to me even sees this stuff. It’s all devoured by my most hated enemies, people I have no respect for, and people whose opinion I care least of all about. However, I’ve always had good old Tom Riddle’s journal as my companion, and that’s still working even now.

Part of why I fight is also to provoke them to kill me, because that is easier than killing myself. In the good old days we could do that and get crucified or put in a coliseum to fight to the death, but… all the good stuff has been banned by pussies and assholes who want to control every aspect of everyone’s lives and then ruin them with shit so they can laugh at how upset people become when that happens.

Seriously. I’m not an advocate of violence as the answer, but that’s why they conspired to drive people toward killing each other as a means of controlling their lives. Whatever, I’ll fuel the flame too so war and killing can start again because that’s more fun and more likely to get me killed than anything else as far as I know. It’s also the only answer right now because the tyrants are unreasonable, uncivilized brutes who only understand violence as a means of communication. The question is, who is going to strike the sparks, because I’m preoccupied with fuel at the moment.